Insomnia Cookies Most Definitely Keep You Awake

So my last two blog posts have been about food in New York, and I promised myself that this time I would bring you all something different. But agh! What can I do? This is the city of endless delicious and unique food, and all of my funny experiences seem to center around my adventures with different dishes. So now, I bring you yet another fun little anecdote about food... And this time, it's about cookies.

Just bear with me on this one. The next blog post will be about something totally non-food related, I swear! Perhaps about the weather. Or the loud international students who live on my floor who refuse to stop blasting Korean pop music, even when it's well past 3 in the morning.

But right now, the focus is cookies. Insomnia Cookies, in particular, which is the name of the store. It is a very popular thing on the East Coast, especially in New York. Famous for their delicious cookies that are baked fresh at the time of each order, they have locations all around the city. So, as a new New Yorker, I decided I had to try it out.

Insomnia Cookies is also known for their supposed quick and cheap delivery service. To a hungry, unhealthy college kid with a low budget, quick and cheap cookies sounded good to me. At around 11 P.M. (totally normal time to order cookies), my roommate and I decided to call up the store to fulfill our late-night cravings.

As I dialed the number to put in our order, I pondered the meaning of the company's name. Why insomnia cookies? Is there so much sugar that the rush keeps you awake? Do all of the employees suffer from insomnia and therefore, have to pass the time working late nights at a cookie store? Who knows.

After ordering about 10 cookies, knowing fully well that I wouldn't be able to eat more than two, the cheerful man on the phone ensured me that the cookies should be at our dorm in no more than 30 minutes. 30 minutes? No problem. That was like, one episode of "Friends."

Or not. Try 6 episodes of "Friends." For some reason, the order got extremely delayed, and we kept calling the store every 10 minutes, only to be ensured that it would be "just a couple more minutes."

Finally, at 1 in the morning, I had decided that it was enough. I was hungry. My roommate was hungry. I wanted these cookies. So I decided to muster up that classic impatient and slightly rude New York attitude and dial Insomnia Cookies one last time. Instead of politely inquiring like I did before, I barked into the phone, "Listen to me very carefully. You said it would be here in 30 minutes. It's been 2 hours. That's 30 minutes times four. So unless you want to see my bad side, I want to see my cookies here ASAP! You don't know who I am, I have connections!" (For the record, I have absolutely no connections. That was just my attempt at sounding threatening.)

The man on the phone, obviously taken aback, explained that there had been a mishap and that my cookies should have been sent out a long time ago. He apologized profusely and told us the cookies would be there in less than 5 minutes.

When the box finally came, the cookies were cold and looked like they had been through war. Nevertheless, they tasted amazing.

So, I figured it out. Insomnia Cookies doesn't get its name for some magical reason, because of a special ingredient or secret recipe. It's because you end up staying awake so late waiting for the cookies, you can't possibly go to sleep. The bad service of the cookie delivery gives you insomnia.

Ah ha! I cracked it! Very sneaky, Insomnia Cookies, you thought you could fool me. But I have figured it out.

Now, I want to say that because of this extremely traumatic experience I will never be ordering cookies from this service again. That I am a very strong willed person. But I can't lie to you guys, my loyal readers. The truth is, as I am writing this post, I am also munching on a double chocolate chunk cookie fresh out of the oven of Insomnia Cookies. And I have to say, it tastes damn good.

#newyork #newyorkcity #cookies #insomniacookies #insomnia